Time.

As I sit here, I come to the realization that it has been two weeks since I lost my son. I cannot explain the ache I have in my heart.

I know that time will make things better but I still can't believe the events of the past few weeks. I am off of work for now to heal not only from my foot surgery but to cope with the loss of my Robert.

I never in my wildest of wildest dreams or nightmares believed I could still be standing through all of this.
But I know I have an army of friends and family that love me and my husband and our two boys. Without them I do not know what I would have done.

now I am left with memories and pictures.

My focus is on Trevor and Kevin, Robert's younger brothers. I can't get enough of them right now. They occupy my thoughts and make me smile. They are the most wonderful gifts I have. They remind me of the happy moments with Robert and I see him in their smile.

Do you know that I have never seen a YOOHOO truck in my town and in the past week I have seen 2. I'd like to think its my son saying "I miss you Mom, and I'm right here."